school dismissal

You know how you when you were a kid at school like two hours before release time, (funny they call it release, as if you will be released from retention, or jail); you start dreaming of going home to be free. When you dream of that moment, you don’t necessarily focus on what you will be doing there.. Just on BEING there, as in emancipation from an unknown state to a secure familiar dwelling. You just have an inner drive to be there safely; put on your comfortable PJ and be free to tune off. This same feeling I have now everyday, toward the afternoon, I yearn for an unknown security, a dwelling with a mom, an unconditional security provider that smells of lavender and simple cleanliness. When I get home now, I go deep into my room that I call my parlor. When I don’t find the smell, the safety I am yearning for, I simply fall asleep. Yearning for warmth and freedom and security and love. On my off days, I miss missing safety, and the day is just lost. That day does not count.